Menopause and Mental Health

menopause and mental health

As women, and as a society in general, we openly talk about breast cancer, ovarian cancer, and even periods, but how often do you see menopause spoken about in the media, day to day conversations, and on social media?

Even in 2020, menopause still seems to be a taboo subject. Surely, we’ve moved on from the Victorian period (pardon the pun) where menopause was considered a disease! What makes it uncomfortable for people to discuss? Like puberty, menopause is a natural part of a woman’s life, and it should be recognised, appreciated, and celebrated.

Today is World Menopause Day, and I guess that gives us permission to be open and frank about the subject matter. I’m certainly taking the opportunity and hope you will too!

Why is a counsellor talking about menopause? Firstly, I see a lot of women present to me that are in their 40s and 50s who are experiencing peri-menopause or menopause, and don’t realise there could be a correlation between this and their presenting issues (relationships, forgetfulness, mood swings, anxiety, panic attacks, etc); and secondly, I have been through both peri-menopause and menopause and while every journey is different, I can speak to the subject matter with first hand experience.

What is menopause and what causes it?

Menopause is a natural process that occurs when a woman has stopped having periods for at least a year, and therefore is no longer able to conceive naturally.  The process takes place when a woman’s body goes through a change in hormone levels given she has stopped producing eggs, and is commonly known as the ‘Change of Life’.

What are the symptoms?

So, let’s start with the common symptoms to look for if you are going through menopause.  Some women do not experience any of these symptoms, some a few, and some most of them. Menopause is different for every woman.

  • Irregular periods
  • Hot flushes
  • Night sweats
  • Sleep disturbances and insomnia
  • Weight gain
  • Anxiety and/or panic attacks
  • Loss of confidence
  • Mood swings, irritability and tearfulness
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Problems with memory
  • “Crawling feelings” under the skin
  • Vaginal dryness
  • Reduced sex drive
  • Discomfort during sex

Menopause and Mental Health

It’s not uncommon for women in their early to mid-40s to notice they are feeling sluggish, feeling unattractive, experiencing weight gain that is hard to shift, experiencing a change in libido, having less tolerance to people and perhaps causing conflict with partners, loved ones, or work colleagues, and starting to feel a loss of identity. Peri-menopause (the period of time before menopause) can be the cause of these various underlying issues for many women and the symptoms are often overlooked. If we are aware that feeling like this could be just menopause, we can apply strategies to deal with these issues.

Imagine realising that your arguments at work aren’t because your boss suddenly has it in for you, or your reduced sexual activity isn’t because your partner finds you unattractive like you assumed, but because your hormones are causing you to become irritable and self-conscious. When you can step back and look at the bigger picture, it can be easier to find the context and therefore solutions to problems. Too often – women especially – can get caught up in a bubble and only concentrate on the issue at hand, when the source of the issue could be somewhere else entirely.

Celebrating Menopause

The good news is it is not all doom and gloom.  Let’s look at some of the more desirable and liberating aspects about menopause that may give you cause to celebrate:

  • no more periods (hello white dresses all year around!)
  • no more worrying about unplanned or unwanted pregnancies and hence a feeling of freedom
  • no more PMS
  • no more contraception

Menopause can provide greater freedom in our lives.  It can be time of personal growth, more self-awareness, greater self-confidence, and increased independence. When you can identify the areas that menopause is playing a part in the various aspects of your life, you can better prepare, manage, and overcome those issues.

Menopause is not just a women’s issue.  We all need to start talking about it – our symptoms, our concerns, our celebrations – and we need to talk to everyone about it to help demystify it and help the next generation of women to become better informed and embrace this stage of their life.

If you are among the one in three women who experiences issues in menopause, there are many options for managing your symptoms. Talk to your GP and ensure you follow a healthy lifestyle by eating healthy and keeping up your exercise. Studies have shown that exercise such as yoga, can help with some menopausal symptoms. If you are suffering from anxiety or struggling with loss of identity or loss of confidence, you can also talk to a counsellor who can help by using cognitive behavioural therapy or mindfulness techniques to help you cope with issues that are concerning you.

It has happened to me and while peri-menopause (the years leading up to menopause) was horrendous, menopause has been a happier time for me. It can be for you too!

If you need help with this issue, contact me and find out how I can help.

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